Clean bill of health… up to date on all vaccinations… a little emotional to be in the same room where I stoked Winnie’s coat as she took her last breath, but I did okay. I’ll admit, there was that “what if something’s wrong nervousness” that I think I’ll always have.
That one is thanks to John… I’d get so nervous before his oncology checkups… I couldn’t sleep, I felt nauseous, had that feeling in the pit of my stomach… and John never seemed to worry… maybe he did, but he didn’t externally. I had that dread— what if it was back???
Then everything would be fine and I’d stressed myself for no reason.
After we had Nathaniel, life was so good. One day, I quit worrying. We went in for that visit with our baby. Everybody in the office loved him. John told the doctor that if it hadn’t been for him- he wouldn’t be here and we would never have been able to have had a child… that was the visit where we found out it came back 😦 Damn fucking cancer… the beginning of the end…
However, today, I didn’t need to worry… the kitties got a clean bill of health. Phew!