Tag Archives: alone

* Warning Graphic ** Comparing Grief to Proud Flesh

Posted on November 17, 2010 by Mary K. Smith

****************************** OK ************************ ********************* You’ve ****************************** *********************************been ********************* *****************************************warned *********** ******** no actual graphic photos ****** but graphic links *** John would shake his head and comment on how I could relate EVERYTHING to horses- often with a roll of … Continue reading →

Posted in Horses, Leaky Creek, Life after John's Death, Pre-stage IV | Tagged alone, bloody, Doc Bar, grief, Horses, proud flesh, relating everything, relating everything to horses, Remi, Remington, vet | Leave a comment

Dear friend…

Posted on September 24, 2010 by Mary K. Smith

To My Friend I have lost the one I love, the one I cherish. My lover, my best friend, my whole life. Either you have stumbled across this because you want to find out how to help me, or I … Continue reading →

Posted in Life after John's Death | Tagged alone, depressed, fukitol, how I am feeling, how you can help, Letter to a friend, momentous tasks, over worked, struggling, tired | Leave a comment

I don’t understand people sometimes…

Posted on July 23, 2010 by Mary K. Smith

I don’t know if most people * don’t know how to react, so they don’t say anything * don’t know how I’ll react, so they don’t say anything * have forgotten * don’t care * don’t want to recognize an … Continue reading →

Posted in Life after John's Death | Tagged abandoned, AFD, alone, anniverary, bitter, CFCRS, disappointed by the human race, DOD, forgotten, hurt, John, loss, Mary, Nathaniel, rat's ass, union | 2 Comments

As it draws closer

Posted on July 7, 2010 by Mary K. Smith

With every passing day, it draws closer to a year without John. In jumbled order… somewhere around this time we were watching the Tour de France together. There was the terrible pop of bone… the awful MRI experience (for … Continue reading →

Posted in Annapolis Fire Department, Life after John's Death, Nathaniel | Tagged AFD. Annapolis Fire Department, alone, ambulance, bachelors, beer, big picture, dating, Disney, divorcess, encouragement, future, happiness, issues, John, let go, lonely, lost, love, move on, Murphy's law, Nathaniel, overwhelming, sad, support, Team Smitty, Tour de France, vacations, widow | Leave a comment

Nobody

Posted on November 26, 2009 by Mary K. Smith

I had a thought earlier today. Being alone again… there’s nobody to tell me, “Mary, that’s a dumb idea.” Not that John ever quite said it that way or ever treated me like that– I’m a little more blunt. But … Continue reading →

Posted in Life after John's Death, Nathaniel | Tagged 35, alone, best raise, cancer, confiding, dangerous, decides, dumb idea, H1N1, John, Mary, my decision, nobody, partnership, perfect world, right, safe, soul-mate, together, two parents, wrong | 1 Comment