Difficult conversations

Today, I had a conversation with my three year old son about the importance of skin checks and watching his skin for signs of changes.  I told him if he ever has a mole that changes that he has to go see a doctor, immediately to get it checked.

He said, “NO!  I don’t like doctors.”

I tried to explain to him that doctors are good.  He loves his doctor, so I think he was just being a stinkerbutt.

I told him that if Daddy had gotten his skin checked sooner he might still be here.

He said, “Where is Daddy?”


“When is he coming back?”

I wished I hadn’t started this conversation, but I try to be honest and truthful with my child.  I told him that he couldn’t come back.

He said, “But I miss him.  I want him to come back.”

Conversations that we shouldn’t be having with our young children… sigh… have I mentioned that widowhood sucks… cancer sucks… I miss my husband… I want him back, too.

So…  check your skin… have annual skin checks with your dermatologist… put on your sunscreen or wear sun safe clothing… and go give your kids a hug and tell them how much you love them because John can’t do that for Nathaniel anymore.

About Mary K. Smith

I was widowed in July 2009, when I lost my beloved husband, John, to melanoma. Cancer SUCKS. We have a young son who was just a year old when his father died. I live on a small farm in Maryland which is home to horses, cats, and a dog. I started this blog as a way for me to heal, a way to remember my husband, and eventually I'd like to share it with our son so he can see the love that his father had for him, the love that we had for each other, what a great person his father was, and how hard his father fought to live.
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1 Response to Difficult conversations

  1. Shanda says:


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