Song:  Rainbow

Artist:  Blackfoot

A friend posted this on my facebook page because of the rainbows.  As I played the video, Nathaniel started dancing.  Well… his version of dancing… swaying back and forth.

It reminded me of his daddy dancing.  I loved to slow dance with John, but I could only drag him out for about one song during a wedding… if I was lucky.  Neither of us were gifted in the dancing department.  But there was just something that I loved being wrapped in his arms and swaying from side to side.

And then there was John’s “chair dancing.”  lol  During weddings while the silly dancing that happens at all weddings… you know DJ staples like –

Song:  The Loco-Motion            Artist:  Kylie Minogue

Song:  Macarena          Artist:  Los Del Rio

And I can’t forget my favorite “chair dance” of John’s…

The infamous Chicken Dance…

John was just so darn cute (in my opinion) as we were sitting off to the side somewhere way far away from the dancing and there he’d be “chair dancing.”  I’ll always love how he’d sit there doing the chicken dance.  He’d make goofy faces the whole time.  I’d just laugh at him and smile. It’s funny the little things that you love about somebody.

Ah… memories…

The last wedding we went to was his cousin Michele’s wedding.  Michele married Steve and both of us thought the world of them.  Brittany, Michele’s daughter was there looking so grown up and happy.   John adored Brittany and Brittany adored John.  We were so happy that they Steve & Michele were getting married after several years of dating.  Steve always seemed like he was part of the family and the wedding made it official.  Their wedding was also Nathaniel’s first wedding.

John was just recovering from his surgery for stage III melanoma that he’d had on Columbus Day 2008.  He carried Nathaniel in the baby carrier out to the Jeep.  He reached in his pocket for his keys & POP!!!  Suddenly  his clothes were soaked… especially his pants.  On the way home he joked about how he was glad it had happened at the car and not as he was shaking hands and giving congratulations.

Apparently his surgery site hadn’t been draining correctly and well, he just took care of the drainage problem.  lol

So, instead of heading to the reception, we headed home to get John fresh clothes and he insisted that I call the doctor to make sure everything was okay.  I knew it was, from dealing with abscesses in the animals.  I humored him and called the doctor without complaint and confirmed that as long as he felt fine and didn’t have a fever he was fine.  I knew John wanted to hear it from a doctor and not from me saying… “with the horses…” or “we had a cat that had an abcess…”

John surprised me by getting cleaned up and deciding to head back to the reception.  I thought after that experience that he’d be done for the day.  He wasn’t a fan of weddings or wedding receptions and quite frankly… other than the slow dance that I could usually manage to fit it… I’m not a wedding fan either.  We were the type that was much more likely to find an excuse not to go to a wedding than to attend one… it’s just the way we were.  No frills.  No drama.  No excitement.  No dressing up.  And people who know me know that I label myself as “no fun.”

We showed up at the reception a few hours late.  Everybody had a great time playing with Nathaniel.  While everybody was gaga-ing over Nathaniel, we escaped for a few moments and almost felt like we did before Nathaniel.  John whispered something in my ear (sorry, I’m keeping that one to myself- maybe if I write a book someday…)  I laughed… we smiled.  Life was good.

I got to have two slow dances that night… one with each of the loves of my life–my two men–  my beloved husband and my little man!

What a difference a year makes… sigh…

Miss you, John.  Love Always…

About Mary K. Smith

I was widowed in July 2009, when I lost my beloved husband, John, to melanoma. Cancer SUCKS. We have a young son who was just a year old when his father died. I live on a small farm in Maryland which is home to horses, cats, and a dog. I started this blog as a way for me to heal, a way to remember my husband, and eventually I'd like to share it with our son so he can see the love that his father had for him, the love that we had for each other, what a great person his father was, and how hard his father fought to live.
This entry was posted in Family, Life after John's Death, Nathaniel, Pre-stage IV and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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